[luis]

Luis and his pd "Mr X" visited a local club for a practice session, non bridge events lead us to a club with a very very poor level of play. Should be ok to practice anyway we decided but we forgot things were different through the looking glass.

At table #1 we faced a young lady and a woman that should be his grand-grand-grand-mother. Our bidding was 1♠ - 1N ; 4♠ where by agreement 4♠ is a strong hand missing 2 keycards to play a slam. Properly disclosed to the ladies who said "oh how nice" when we explained.
The yound lady leads the heart ace out of turn.
My pd switching to his gentleman voice says to the old lady:
"Please make your natural lead, I don't want advantage from the infraction"
And smiles to the young lady.

I knew we were headed towards disaster, I was just thinking "What will happen when she revokes? A dinner invitation?"

The old lady analyzes her hand and produces the heart 6 from his hand (!) claiming it was his natural lead, it turns out his hand had J fourth of hearts, Q fourth of diamonds and 3 small clubs. Of course 4♠ makes with 0 overtricks for a bottom without a heart lead pd can discard a heart after drawing trumps. Nothing to be said.

Some tables later we face a couple, we bid to 3NT and I was dummy, wifey leads a spade out of turn (common practice), pd calls the TD (not into married women) and after a quick list decides to opt to "forbid" a spade lead. The TD instructs hubby to lead something else and not to play spades whenever he was on lead. I put 4 good spades in dummy but the defense forced to play something else has to reach 5 defensive tricks before pd can do anything.
"Nice choice pd" I say, while moving to the next table.

Can you believe it happened again? This time it was against two middle-aged men, we reach the contract of 3♥ to be played by Mr X and RHO leads a diamond out of turn. This time I was prepared, I reached for my glass of Coke and intentionally collided the glass with the border of the table spilling the coke on the table while at the same time I tried a quick movement to "clean" throwing all my LHO cards face up to the table at the same time. After apologies and a cleaning process the TD decides the board can't be played because of the accident and scores average for both pairs.
"Nicely done Luis, says pd and we move to the next table"

Luis

[han]

Nice story Luis.

When talking about a woman, it is common practice to say "her" instead of "his".

[luis]

Hannie, on May 9 2006, 07:43 PM, said:

Nice story Luis.

When talking about a woman, it is common practice to say "her" instead of "his".

Corrected, thanks :-)

I think that "I don't know, let's foul the board" should be an option for declarer when the opponents make a lead out of turn, it's hard to live with making the wrong decision otherwise. Until this is added to the laws I will design evil plans to foul the board when this happens, LOL.

Luis

[joshs]

ROFL. We designate you, master of leads out of turn.

[42]

Quote

Can you believe it happened again? This time it was against two middle-aged men, we reach the contract of 3♥ to be played by Mr X and RHO leads a diamond out of turn. This time I was prepared, I reached for my glass of Coke and intentionally collided the glass with the border of the table spilling the coke on the table while at the same time I tried a quick movement to "clean" throwing all my LHO cards face up to the table at the same time. After apologies and a cleaning process the TD decides the board can't be played because of the accident and scores average for both pairs.
"Nicely done Luis, says pd and we move to the next table"

*hehe* the good old Coke-coup

Recently I was asked to play in a local club tourney, the officials had invited Danes who had all drinks for free (guess what happened ). After that tourney I knew again why I rarely go to play there... But all in all I had a lot of fun! Every pair got a prize: because it was a German - Danish meeting they had decided for Italian products to win; we were not the winners but lucky enough to have an early chance to decide for the 42th ovenproof dish and Cantuccini
Playing against a local couple, we had a not so nice score because of this:
wife: 1♠ (pass) hubby: DBL
I asked if she plays that weak (this was possible because she is much better than he is, both play since many year btw.). He understood nothing. She: "You cannot DBL ME!" He: "Ehm, what shall I do instead??" She: "Anything else but DBL, man!" Shaking his head, sighing, he painfully grabbed out 2♠, just made. When she saw the dummy with ♠Ax and 13 balanced points, she nearly fell from her chair. What shall I say? 3NT would have been down....
Another experienced local couple, again she better than him and rumours say he shows signs of Alzheimer:
wife: 1NT = 12-15 (pass) hubby: 2NT (pass), she alway accepts, so: 3NT.
I lead my 4th highest ♥, dummy laid down 6 of them, 12 pts. Is it necessary to tell you what kind of score this was for us?

[Gerben42]

Quote

The old lady analyzes her hand and produces the heart 6 from his hand (!) claiming it was his natural lead, it turns out his hand had J fourth of hearts, Q fourth of diamonds and 3 small clubs. Of course 4♠ makes with 0 overtricks for a bottom without a heart lead pd can discard a heart after drawing trumps. Nothing to be said.

You had this one coming. Having endplayed yourself in not calling the director at any time, the "natural" lead from the old lady will always be ♥. But if this is necessary for leaving a good impression with the young lady, it's a small price to pay.

Given the two previous experiences, the coke coup was probably the best decision.

[Free]

Gerben42, on May 16 2006, 09:51 AM, said:

Quote

The old lady analyzes her hand and produces the heart 6 from his hand (!) claiming it was his natural lead, it turns out his hand had J fourth of hearts, Q fourth of diamonds and 3 small clubs. Of course 4♠ makes with 0 overtricks for a bottom without a heart lead pd can discard a heart after drawing trumps. Nothing to be said.

You had this one coming. Having endplayed yourself in not calling the director at any time, the "natural" lead from the old lady will always be ♥. But if this is necessary for leaving a good impression with the young lady, it's a small price to pay.

Given the two previous experiences, the coke coup was probably the best decision.

The only impression you leave with a young girl if you do something like this is "what a loser"

Just accept her lead