[benellis58]

Braindead lead by the braindead GIBBO robot in the West. No, his imbecilic lead did NOT work out well for him. Shocking, isn't it, that leading his (chuckle) stiff 9 against 3NT didn't work out?

Why do these rejects even BOTHER?

https://www.bridgeba...S9%7Cpc%7CD7%7C

[benellis58]

Even within the context of their hopeless system, why would North bid 3H with THAT hand? We scored 76 % on the board, so the dweeb probably thinks he bid it brilliantly. I won't tell him the truth if you don't.

https://www.bridgeba...D2%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

Another "challenging" (ha, ha) "defence" by the GIBBO robots. Why don't you give up bridge and take up a new hobby, losers? You GIBBO clowns will NEVER be even halfway decent.

https://www.bridgeba...CSJ%7Cmc%7C9%7C

[benellis58]

1NT...with FIVE (!) overtricks!

Yes, by golly, now that you mention it, GIBBO robots WERE "defending", but how did you guess?

https://www.bridgeba...D8%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

These GENIUSES manage to set up THREE club winners for declarer after the first two tricks have been played, but Heaven FORBID they should take their RUFF at trick three. C.R.E.T.I.N.S.!

Remind me again, o ye staunch defenders of GIBBO honour: If I'm not mistaken, you said that the GIBBO robots are "far better than most human players". Do I have that right? Just checking.

https://www.bridgeba...H3%7Cpc%7CDK%7C

[benellis58]

ANOTHER laughable "defence". Gee, I guess no one could have seen THAT coming. And by "no one", I mean not more than 100 million people.

https://www.bridgeba...HT%7Cpc%7CDJ%7C

[benellis58]

No, the GIBBO robot who "declared" this hand did NOT win a Bols Brilliancy Prize for it. Is anyone surprised? I said, "Is ANYONE surprised?" ANYONE? HELLO? Is this microphone working?

But I shouldn't be mocking the GIBBO robot's DECLARER play, because, to be fair, I once saw a TURTLE declare a hand ALMOST as badly.

https://www.bridgeba...S6%7Cpc%7CC4%7C

[benellis58]

The lucky stiff got to make one of his FAOURITE (stupid) leads, his stiff trump.

Sorry, my hearing is not that good. What's that question you asked?

Thanks for repeating your question. I apologize for not hearing it the first time, and I'm happy to answer: No, his lead did NOT work out well. Does it EVER?

https://www.bridgeba...D7%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

North adds to the MOUNTAIN of evidence proving that the GIBBO robots know NOTHING about how to bid two-suiters, but luckily we get a shared top anyway, despite his legendary lack of knowledge.

https://www.bridgeba...C9%7Cpc%7CSJ%7C

[benellis58]

I have an easy question and a difficult question.

The Easy Question: In reference to the GIBBO robots, what is the BEST part of their bridge game?

Answer: EASY! Declarer play, by far! Not that they are great (because they sure as Hell are NOT!), but they are not as astoundingly horrendous as they are at every other facet of bridge.

The Hard Question: In reference to the GIBBO robots, what is the WORST part of their bridge game?

Answer: Too tough to answer. Sometimes I think it's their nauseating, braindead bidding. Sometimes I think it's their stupid, illogical leads. Sometimes I think it's their horrendous, compellingly wretched "defence". The bottom line is that I cannot decide, becauser they are so STUNNINGLY bad at all three. They are the worst bidders I have ever encountered, the worst leaders, and the worst "defenders", so maybe you can distinguish, but I can't, because they are sickeningly bad at EVERYTHING except declarer play.

[benellis58]

North's 2D? No way to even suggest the possibility of SPADES in the hopeless, antiquated GIBBO system?

West's 3H? Fair enough, but if so, then...change the definition (!), because he certainly does not have "13-16 total points".

https://www.bridgeba...CC2%7Cmc%7C9%7C

[benellis58]

Several observations from this one hand:

1. This is a PERFECT example of why it often (perhaps even usually) pays to operate against the braindead GIBBO robots.

2. West actually makes a NORMAL club lead! Bravo, Mr. West! But...

3. East demonstrates that he failed to read the chapter on unblocking, thereby proving that he is as "clever" as all the other completely imbecilic GIBBO clowns.

4. Having made a GOOD, NORMAL (!) lead, West now STUPIDLY, and for absolutely NO reason, shifts to the jack of spades from his J10 dub. It appears that it's impossible for these GIBBO derelicts to ever make TWO normal or good plays in a row.

5. At trick 9, when I cash the ace of clubs and pitch a diamond from dummy North, East STUPIDLY (!!!) pitches a HEART (!!!) instead of CORRECTLY pitching either the ace or king of diamonds. Any defender with a functioning brain would SEE that this IMBECILIC heart (!) pitch would be CONCEDING all but the final trick to NS. but "Ginsberg's Intelligent Bridgeplayer" (sic!) can't even figure out such a simple, OBVIOUS thing! As I've often remarked, the "I"-word in the product name that identifies these hopeless clods should DEFINITELY not be "Intelligent". Much more appropriate would be "Ignorant", "Imbecilic", "I.D.I.O.T.I.C.", "Incompetent", "Inept", "Inferior", "Irritating", "Infuriating", "Incorrect", or "Inexplicably Bad".

6. Final observation (as usual): GIBBO robots rot.

https://www.bridgeba...DJ%7Cpc%7CCT%7C

[benellis58]

Stupid lead: 7 of spades from KQ87 INTO declarer South, who has SHOWN four or five spades via his response to Stayman.

East wins his diamond ace at trick two and actually returns his partner's suit (!), something GIBBO slime usually HATES to do!

West wins his spade queen and then...cashes his spade king (!), which doesn't exactly hurt me! If these dweebs knew ANYTHING, West would have KNOWN from East's two spade plays that South had been born with FIVE spades.

https://www.bridgeba...DQ%7Cpc%7CC3%7C

[benellis58]

West leads the club deuce. East wins his club ace. (Nice play.) He then...SHIFTS (!) to the EIGHT (??!!) of hearts from JACK-EIGHT (??!!). NOT a "nice play". WHY is the clueless piece of dirt switching at ALL (!), and why to the abnormal eight?

West wins his heart queen and...goes BACK to CLUBS. This is SO typical of these abhorrent monstrosities. Rather than EVER continuing a suit that "partner" (ahem!) leads, they switch...and if "partner" happens to win the switch, HE shifts back! Thus, they never set up EITHER suit.

It's like two little kids making mudpies in a sandbox: "I'm right." "No. I'M right." "No you're not." "Yes I am." "You're stupid." "No, YOU'RE stupid." Then one will say, "Your mother wears army boots," and the back-and-forth NEVER ends. The only difference is that the two little kids will mature, grow up, and grow OUT of their foibles...whereas the truly repulsive GIBBO robots obviously NEVER will (and probably STILL enjoy making mudpies).

Thanks to the HOPELESS "defence" with the inept back and forth of Frick and Frack, I have an easy squeeze against West: When I cash dummy's spade king at trick 11, the poor sap cannot keep BOTH his high club jack AND his heart stopper of K5 dub, so I take all three of the final three tricks, via dummy's spade king at trick 11, my heart ace at trick 12, and my heart 9 at trick 13. Eleven tricks in all.


Terrific "defence", boys - NOT! Maybe instead of calling the goofballs Frick and Frack, I should have called them "H AND H"...for Hopeless and Horrible. GIBBO robots rot.

https://www.bridgeba...CT%7Cpc%7CC8%7C

[benellis58]

West is on lead THREE times in the first five tricks. On those THREE occasions, he leads THREE (!) DIFFERENT (!) suits. His philosophy, apparently learned in GIBBO Bridge School, seems to be "Why just give away ONE suit when you can just as easily give away THREE?" He learned his lesson well, I must admit, because he and ALL his GIBBO brothers and sisters are the best I have ever seen at...giving away tricks.

Proving that bridge is truly a partnership game, East also does HIS part in the "defensive" travesty, so that he becomes inexorably squeezed and after 10 tricks cannot retain BOTH his high club king AND his heart stopper of Q82, thereby allowing me to take ALL the remaining tricks and score three overtricks in 1NT.

Question: Do GIBBO robots stink at bridge?

Answer: Uh, yes, now that you mention it, they indeed do.

https://www.bridgeba...CQ%7Cpc%7CCK%7C

[benellis58]

I was pleased and surprised to score 56.25 % on this board for going down three (!) in 3NT. I was not pleased with the way I played it. For example, just by guessing hearts correctly I would have saved two tricks and gone down "only" one.

I was also not pleased with North's bidding. I realize that is not exactly shocking. WHY do these total C.R.E.T.I.N.S. have the awesomely stupid HABIT of committing RIDICULOUS cuebids at relatively high levels?

North's initial double, followed by his later 3C call, had already described his hand, since 3C was defined as "4+ clubs; 4+ hearts; 11- HCP; 9-12 total points", so if he felt COMPELLED to bid in the passout seat over East's 3D (despite having ALREADY shown his hand), why not either double or 4C and let the chips fall where they may? Had we gotten even a BOTTOM if he had made either of those calls, I would not have bothered posting this hand, but as SOON as I saw the lummox's insane 3S bid hit the table - even BEFORE I saw his hand - I was seeing...RED, because I've been down this road way too many times with these disgusting monstrosities and I KNOW that ANY time they make one of their ubiquitous cuebids it is likely to result in disaster.

https://www.bridgeba...C9%7Cpc%7CSK%7C

[benellis58]

Typical foolish, illogical, unthinking lead by Superstooge in the West. Is the blinkered feeb so DESPERATE to get ruffs (!) when he has jack-ten fourth of trumps? Why are these clowns EVER even at a bridge table?

https://www.bridgeba...DK%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

West's sequence was invitational in hearts. WHY would he WANT to invite? Yes, I see his 12 HCP. So what? Five of them are in quacks, three of them are in the ENEMY suit (spades), he has ONLY two hearts, and his partner East is a PASSED hand.

Not only that, but he is (sigh) not even adhering to his own GIB definition, which states that his 3H call shows "3-4 hearts".

https://www.bridgeba...S5%7Cpc%7CH4%7C

[benellis58]

On an unrevealing auction of 1NT-3NT by the opponents, it's true that "anything" might be "right" or "wrong" on this random hand, but...

West has 83, Q10652, Q92, KJ2...so why would he lead ANYTHING other than a NORMAL heart (and all the MORE so, since he is a GIBBO robot, who was programmed by Lorserker to lead BETTER than his foul GIB predecessors, who were even WORSE at leads than GIBBO)?

This fish leads the spade 8 from his worthless doubleton rather than a NORMAL heart from Q10652. WHY?

https://www.bridgeba...H3%7Cpc%7CDT%7C

[benellis58]

Another awesomely ridiculous lead by Johnny Halfwit (or is it Donnie Dumbo?) in the West? His stiff spade king - did this clown fall out of a panel truck on the way back from a corn roast or did he fall out of a limo on the way back from Walter Reed?

Then, when declarer plays a diamond at trick two, Johnny (or Donnie?) wins and plays...of COURSE...another DIAMOND. Declarer wins and plays a third round of diamonds. Johnny/Donnie wins THAT and again of COURSE plays another DIAMOND, laughing uproariously as he brags, "Ha, ha, you've just established my fifth diamond, Mr. Declarer." Perhaps poor addlepated J/D (speaking of addlepated!) is unaware that he has NO ENTRY to EVER cash that fifth diamond that he is SO proud of.

J/D is astounded - astounded, I tell you - to discover that he emerges with a VERY poor score on the board. "But...how can that be?" asks J/D, as he rubs some of the makeup from his bruised hand. "I found the spade lead. I found the diamond continuations. So why did I get a poor score?"

https://www.bridgeba...S6%7Cpc%7CS9%7C